My artwork investigates the contemporary Filipino-American identity through oil painting, drawing, and mixed-media pieces. I find myself expressing my lived experiences through painterly brush strokes, intricate portraiture, intimate illustrations, and nostalgic found objects. I gather inspiration from my personal and ancestral history, and contemporary-living signifiers ( i.e. a melted Spongebob popsicle stick, nostalgic food brands, and the balikbayan box). Through my lens, my portraits are documenting the experiences of my family, our culture, and declaring our existence. 

In my recent work, I am building on the correlation of the familiar objects with my personal narrative. Living in the diaspora naturally brings up feelings about whether you are “Filipino enough”, like a puzzle piece that doesn’t quite fit in the overall picture. What has helped me come to terms with this inner turmoil, is focusing on the cultural practices that make me feel Filipino, and the objects that were integral to my childhood. Even without knowing the term “Balikbayan” (a term for a Filipino returning to the Philippines), I saw it as a care package growing up. A large package that my family would spend time carefully curating. They would thoughtfully gather outgrown clothes, name brand soaps, and grocery items when they were on sale. Without directly knowing it, I was observing our culture. 

To live this life in the diaspora in fulfillment of the American dream comes at cost. As I continue to incorporate the balikbayan box in my paintings, I’m excited to dive deeper into the relationship of belonging and longing. The connection with the boxes is a physical reminder of the distance between us and the Philippines. With all the joy, opportunities, and success, there is also loss, sadness, and sacrifices. The dichotomy of these themes open a conversation, so what had once felt like a siloed experience in my upbringing, can now be expressed as a shared one. Through my process of documenting my family’s experiences, I am developing a deeper understanding of our kinship, and how it can invite others in and extend beyond a personal narrative.